Got an email from my nephew today saying that the golf course is closing on October 23. Good to know. Last night we went on a bike ride. Meandered through the course. It was warm. No wind. I lamented about not being out there golfing. When I got the text I checked the forecast. Single digit temperatures. Chance of snow Sunday. Does not look promising. The realization has hit. Golfing season, for all intents and purposes, is over.
So if golfing is not part of the equation it might as well snow. Otherwise, just like this afternoon, I look out the window and wonder what if. What if I had gone out? I still have a chance. Plus 2, slight, make that significant, breeze from the north. No problem. Yeah right. Big problem.
In spring this kind of day could well get me out there. In fall, not so much. I need to move on. Someone suggested to me that I should find an activity for winter. Options are limited. I could try hockey but am miserably out of shape and know if I fall I may never get up again and if I do I will have pain for the rest of my life. I could try curling. I won two trophies thirty years ago. Quit at the top. Know for a fact there is no higher goal I could achieve. Still working on my delivery. It was pathetic back then. Nothing has changed. Not sure anyone would have me.
I started writing this early in the week. Here it is Tuesday and guess what. The ground is white. Do I have the right to change my mind? I don’t think I want snow. However, when I look out the window towards the golf course I can honestly say I am not tempted to go out and hit a few balls.
So we begin another Manitoba winter. Will it be a three month ordeal? Or will it be six months? Will we have lots of snow? Will the temperatures be above normal or below? Nobody knows. Predictions are being made. We shall see.
Really the answers to the above questions do not matter. We do this every year. We wait and we wonder. And year in and year out we survive. Each year we bitch and complain about this horrible place we live in. And each year we wait with baited breath for spring. And when spring arrives we have an ah-ha moment. We realize why we live here. Why we are resilient enough to survive another one.
Quite frankly when I saw the snow at the beginning of the week I quickly lost interest in another fight with winter. I started to regret that I had not taken advantage of the warmer weather in September. I felt remorse at not having golfed more than I did. I felt my anxiety building. As I sat in my office, preparing a presentation, I came across a quote as follows. “If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present.” That gave me an ah-ha moment. I need to work on living in the present. Perhaps take care of some of my anxiety, some dark moments, regrets and all the other negative thoughts that are so quick to arise. Enjoy the moment. That is all we have. The moment. Make it a good one.
The Recovering Farmer
Friday, October 25, 2013
Thursday, October 17, 2013
Take A Minute
I often talk about the fast paced world we live in. The need to pause. To take a moment. We become so immersed in our lives that when we actually take a moment we are stumped. We don’t know how to deal with that. Part of this busyness also has the potential to manifest itself in how we treat others. What runs through your mind when someone cuts you off in traffic, when someone bumps your ankles with a shopping cart, when someone seems to have all day at the gas pumps, when someone refuses to dim their lights for you, or you find out they did but have these bright fog lamps on AND ITS NOT FOGGY. Whoops. I guess I began answering my own question.
Just this last weekend we were buying some groceries. We got to the checkout line and found it to be rather busy. So the natural human response is to do an assessment. Which line is shortest? Which cashier appears most competent? Which customer is the patient, let’s make sure of all prices, and which items do I have coupons for, and “wait a minute, I forgot the asparagus”. I can tell you that I always pick the wrong one. And within a nanosecond I am frustrated. Some might suggest I am that way before I get to the store. If so it is because traffic seems to be the same way. Do people not realize I have places to go and things to do?
Wait a minute. It’s the weekend. What is my rush? It just seems to be inherent for me to rush. Get where I am going. Hurry up and wait. Many blogs ago I suggested that you should take a minute to chat with the person bagging your groceries. (I did that the other day and found out I was talking to myself. I will leave that for another day.) Talk to the person filling your gas tank. You will be pleasantly surprised at the response you get. Although, I will warn you, there are times when the response you get just makes you want to give up because you end up listening to someone’s sob story which surely cannot be as bad as yours. But it may be and you may have just given someone the wherewithal to share their problems. It is all in perspective, right?
I did finally go for my physical for my class 1 license. I had decided not to till I heard one person say that as long as you can drive truck you will never starve. Obviously I seemed to be unsure of my future employment so did get the physical done. As I chatted with the doctor, told him all my ailments, he finally said that he would give me the full meal deal. That sounded ominous. I thought the rubber glove snapping into place would be the . . . . I will leave it at that.
I ended up in a room with a “nurse” who did not appear to be happy. As I sat waiting more people came in and the more people that came in the more agitated she became. I dreaded what I was about to experience. You really do not want someone in a foul mood to be putting electrodes on your body, particularly if you have any hair.
I survived. In fact, what was interesting is that when she applied the electrodes she appeared, shall we say, enthused with her job. By the time we were done she was quite apologetic as she removed the electrodes. Why? I made an effort to chat with her. For the most part a benign conversation. Nonetheless, I had her chuckling about things that I was muttering about going through a somewhat humiliating experience. We shared a story. We shared a laugh.
It helped me remove my thoughts from tests that would surely confirm that I was dying. It helped her get through a day that was busy. A day filled with countless electrodes on countless white flaccid bodies that look even worse than mine. For the moment we could share a chuckle, a chuckle that helped both of us make it through the day.
As I left the doctor’s office that day I heard the nurse, in the background, thank me and wish me a good day. She had not done that for other patients. It gave me a warm, comfortable feeling. In my nervous chatting with her I had helped her cope. In her response to me she helped me cope. Made for a better day for both of us. The only problem? I need to make a follow-up appointment to find out the results of all my tests. Find out how much time I have left. I will keep you posted. Make it a good one.
Just this last weekend we were buying some groceries. We got to the checkout line and found it to be rather busy. So the natural human response is to do an assessment. Which line is shortest? Which cashier appears most competent? Which customer is the patient, let’s make sure of all prices, and which items do I have coupons for, and “wait a minute, I forgot the asparagus”. I can tell you that I always pick the wrong one. And within a nanosecond I am frustrated. Some might suggest I am that way before I get to the store. If so it is because traffic seems to be the same way. Do people not realize I have places to go and things to do?
Wait a minute. It’s the weekend. What is my rush? It just seems to be inherent for me to rush. Get where I am going. Hurry up and wait. Many blogs ago I suggested that you should take a minute to chat with the person bagging your groceries. (I did that the other day and found out I was talking to myself. I will leave that for another day.) Talk to the person filling your gas tank. You will be pleasantly surprised at the response you get. Although, I will warn you, there are times when the response you get just makes you want to give up because you end up listening to someone’s sob story which surely cannot be as bad as yours. But it may be and you may have just given someone the wherewithal to share their problems. It is all in perspective, right?
I did finally go for my physical for my class 1 license. I had decided not to till I heard one person say that as long as you can drive truck you will never starve. Obviously I seemed to be unsure of my future employment so did get the physical done. As I chatted with the doctor, told him all my ailments, he finally said that he would give me the full meal deal. That sounded ominous. I thought the rubber glove snapping into place would be the . . . . I will leave it at that.
I ended up in a room with a “nurse” who did not appear to be happy. As I sat waiting more people came in and the more people that came in the more agitated she became. I dreaded what I was about to experience. You really do not want someone in a foul mood to be putting electrodes on your body, particularly if you have any hair.
I survived. In fact, what was interesting is that when she applied the electrodes she appeared, shall we say, enthused with her job. By the time we were done she was quite apologetic as she removed the electrodes. Why? I made an effort to chat with her. For the most part a benign conversation. Nonetheless, I had her chuckling about things that I was muttering about going through a somewhat humiliating experience. We shared a story. We shared a laugh.
It helped me remove my thoughts from tests that would surely confirm that I was dying. It helped her get through a day that was busy. A day filled with countless electrodes on countless white flaccid bodies that look even worse than mine. For the moment we could share a chuckle, a chuckle that helped both of us make it through the day.
As I left the doctor’s office that day I heard the nurse, in the background, thank me and wish me a good day. She had not done that for other patients. It gave me a warm, comfortable feeling. In my nervous chatting with her I had helped her cope. In her response to me she helped me cope. Made for a better day for both of us. The only problem? I need to make a follow-up appointment to find out the results of all my tests. Find out how much time I have left. I will keep you posted. Make it a good one.
Thursday, October 10, 2013
Putting Humpty Dumpty Together Again
Many years ago, almost too many to count, I was involved with the hog industry. As chairman (chairperson if you will) we were in significant negotiations with the government to preserve the single desk selling system. For the sake of space and time I will not delve into a description of what single desk selling is. Although there are many who still maintain that that was the beginning of the end for the industry. I am not involved in the industry anymore so why go there.
Actually, perhaps, I still am involved. I have reoccurring dreams about my farm. I dream that the feed has run out and no one took note and did something about it. I dream that the bank is hounding me for money and so I ship pigs that are not heavy enough to garner premiums. I dream that the feed company is delivering feed and they need money from me before they can unload. So they have to call my mother. I dream that I come in the barn and pigs have escaped their pens and are running loose and wreaking havoc. I dream that the person emptying my manure storage has pumped it on neighboring yards and has created floods in their homes. With hog manure.
Jeez, I think I need therapy. The good news is, I suppose, that earlier this year when I was traveling with a sleep expert he informed me that if I can remember dreams I am not depressed. Really? These dreams make me depressed. Like I said. I need therapy.
Getting back to the single desk selling debacle. At the time a news reporter wrote an article and proclaimed, as only he could, that no one could ever put Humpty Dumpty together again. Many took exception to that. Producers were losing something that the majority felt would jeopardize the industry. Perhaps it did. I am not about to discuss that. Remember? I am not involved in the industry. Except when I sleep. Maybe that doesn’t count.
All of us experience life changes. Changes we had not expected. Changes we fight to accept. Changes that, quite literally, change us. I deal with farmers whose dreams have been shattered. I deal with accident victims whose lives have been irrevocably changed. I deal with people whose relationships are deteriorating. People face health challenges that are life changing. None of these events foreseen. None that were asked for.
During and after these crises people wonder how they can ever achieve normalcy in their lives again. Famers wonder whether there is life after farming. Victims of accidents just want to get back to how they were. People with health issues just want a cure. Want to get better. Get back to the health they had before. Many struggle to make relationships better. With spouses, partners, kids. We want to put Humpty Dumpty together again. That was our life. That felt good. That was normal.
But things change and so do we. So many life changing events are completely out of our control. How we deal with them becomes the challenge. Quite often the first step is to understand that we will never put Humpty Dumpty together again. Perhaps the pieces are too small. Perhaps there are some missing. Perhaps we would be better off not trying. Work on building something new. Something better. I know it can work. I have been there. There is hope. There is relief. I know I will never put Humpty Dumpty together again. And based on my dreams I don’t think I want to. Work on something new. Perhaps not an egg this go around. They seem somewhat fragile. Building something better. Make life changes before life changes. Make it a good one.
Actually, perhaps, I still am involved. I have reoccurring dreams about my farm. I dream that the feed has run out and no one took note and did something about it. I dream that the bank is hounding me for money and so I ship pigs that are not heavy enough to garner premiums. I dream that the feed company is delivering feed and they need money from me before they can unload. So they have to call my mother. I dream that I come in the barn and pigs have escaped their pens and are running loose and wreaking havoc. I dream that the person emptying my manure storage has pumped it on neighboring yards and has created floods in their homes. With hog manure.
Jeez, I think I need therapy. The good news is, I suppose, that earlier this year when I was traveling with a sleep expert he informed me that if I can remember dreams I am not depressed. Really? These dreams make me depressed. Like I said. I need therapy.
Getting back to the single desk selling debacle. At the time a news reporter wrote an article and proclaimed, as only he could, that no one could ever put Humpty Dumpty together again. Many took exception to that. Producers were losing something that the majority felt would jeopardize the industry. Perhaps it did. I am not about to discuss that. Remember? I am not involved in the industry. Except when I sleep. Maybe that doesn’t count.
All of us experience life changes. Changes we had not expected. Changes we fight to accept. Changes that, quite literally, change us. I deal with farmers whose dreams have been shattered. I deal with accident victims whose lives have been irrevocably changed. I deal with people whose relationships are deteriorating. People face health challenges that are life changing. None of these events foreseen. None that were asked for.
During and after these crises people wonder how they can ever achieve normalcy in their lives again. Famers wonder whether there is life after farming. Victims of accidents just want to get back to how they were. People with health issues just want a cure. Want to get better. Get back to the health they had before. Many struggle to make relationships better. With spouses, partners, kids. We want to put Humpty Dumpty together again. That was our life. That felt good. That was normal.
But things change and so do we. So many life changing events are completely out of our control. How we deal with them becomes the challenge. Quite often the first step is to understand that we will never put Humpty Dumpty together again. Perhaps the pieces are too small. Perhaps there are some missing. Perhaps we would be better off not trying. Work on building something new. Something better. I know it can work. I have been there. There is hope. There is relief. I know I will never put Humpty Dumpty together again. And based on my dreams I don’t think I want to. Work on something new. Perhaps not an egg this go around. They seem somewhat fragile. Building something better. Make life changes before life changes. Make it a good one.
Sunday, October 6, 2013
Take The Time
When I look around and see many of the things happening in the world I often wonder, what do we really understand. From the chemical warfare in Syria to the government shut down in the US. It is so easy to sit back and throw judgement. But do we really know what we are judging? I know I don’t. Media seems to control what we see and what we hear. Not sure I have seen any media that actually reports an unbiased opinion.
And, quite frankly, I am not convinced that I am unbiased. My thoughts, feelings and beliefs are formed by a certain belief factor. They are shaped by things I hear. By things I see or watch. They are controlled by certain emotions that become involved when I read things. So to suggest I am open minded would probably be somewhat overstated. Although I do try, particularly in my work as a mediator.
It is difficult and sometimes impossible to understand the emotions we experience on a daily basis. We react to circumstances and often times wonder where that came from. We would like to think we live in a normal world but know that is not the case. At least if we understand what normal is. And perhaps we don’t. What really is normal aside from a setting on a dryer.
Modern technology is doing its part in making us confused. We live with the assumption that all this technology is beneficial. We need computers. We need cell phones. We should be part of Twitter, Linkedin, and Facebook. We feel the need to be in tune with the world around us. Last night we stopped at Superstore to pick up some supplies. My job is to patiently push the cart and ensure that I stop and wait whenever necessary. I like to observe people. I was astonished at how many people were doing there shopping while chatting on their phones. Take a look around you next time you are in a restaurant. So many people are ignoring the world around them, ignoring family and friends, forgetting about effective communication. Forgetting about relationships.
We get caught up. We become immersed. When do we take the time to sit back and enjoy life? We upgrade our satellite TV. We follow all there is to follow on our computers. We download apps. We scamper hither and yon to keep up. We become anxious. We become frustrated. We want more. We need more.
Stop. Think about this. What are we really accomplishing? What are we doing for ourselves? For our families? Are we taking the time we should? I heard someone suggest today that we should be “resetting” ourselves as often as we reset our technology. We should be “downloading” “new apps” for ourselves as often as we download apps for our phones or computers. That means we need to take time to fill our emotional gas tanks. We need to work on our relationships. We need to utilize mindfulness as we deal with our day to day challenges. How else do we really expect to survive. To flourish. And to succeed. Take this thought with you. “Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success.” And to be truly happy we need to learn to let go, to take time, and to enjoy life. Make it a good one.
And, quite frankly, I am not convinced that I am unbiased. My thoughts, feelings and beliefs are formed by a certain belief factor. They are shaped by things I hear. By things I see or watch. They are controlled by certain emotions that become involved when I read things. So to suggest I am open minded would probably be somewhat overstated. Although I do try, particularly in my work as a mediator.
It is difficult and sometimes impossible to understand the emotions we experience on a daily basis. We react to circumstances and often times wonder where that came from. We would like to think we live in a normal world but know that is not the case. At least if we understand what normal is. And perhaps we don’t. What really is normal aside from a setting on a dryer.
Modern technology is doing its part in making us confused. We live with the assumption that all this technology is beneficial. We need computers. We need cell phones. We should be part of Twitter, Linkedin, and Facebook. We feel the need to be in tune with the world around us. Last night we stopped at Superstore to pick up some supplies. My job is to patiently push the cart and ensure that I stop and wait whenever necessary. I like to observe people. I was astonished at how many people were doing there shopping while chatting on their phones. Take a look around you next time you are in a restaurant. So many people are ignoring the world around them, ignoring family and friends, forgetting about effective communication. Forgetting about relationships.
We get caught up. We become immersed. When do we take the time to sit back and enjoy life? We upgrade our satellite TV. We follow all there is to follow on our computers. We download apps. We scamper hither and yon to keep up. We become anxious. We become frustrated. We want more. We need more.
Stop. Think about this. What are we really accomplishing? What are we doing for ourselves? For our families? Are we taking the time we should? I heard someone suggest today that we should be “resetting” ourselves as often as we reset our technology. We should be “downloading” “new apps” for ourselves as often as we download apps for our phones or computers. That means we need to take time to fill our emotional gas tanks. We need to work on our relationships. We need to utilize mindfulness as we deal with our day to day challenges. How else do we really expect to survive. To flourish. And to succeed. Take this thought with you. “Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success.” And to be truly happy we need to learn to let go, to take time, and to enjoy life. Make it a good one.
Saturday, September 28, 2013
Git R Done
Okay. I admit it. I stole that. Actually when you think of it, did I? Steal it that is. Stealing is when you take something from someone in a sneaking way hoping no one will find out. Right? Shoplifting would fit in that category. Robbing a bank, on the other hand, is not really being sneaky. You just hope you don’t get caught. Not sure why I am actually talking about this.
Getting back to the title. Over the last week I have taped, oops, excuse me, recorded some comedy shows. Larry the Cable Guy is one of the comedians. Of course he is all about “Git R Done”. I enjoy his sense of humour. Throw in a little Jeff Foxworthy and you have a real show. The other two guys are not quite so funny so I can’t even remember their names. Don’t need too.
Do you know that kids will laugh up to 400 times a day? That is awesome. As adults that very often becomes a dismal 12 times a day. No wonder we have mental health issues. We need to laugh more. We had our grandson at our house this weekend. What a change of pace that is. Not only that. He laughs. He laughs at a lot. Made me envious. I got a real kick out of making him laugh. And when he laughed? Guess what? I had to laugh. Over the most mindless things I was splitting a gut. Wish I could do that more often.
My wife and I did a home renovation project last week. We insulated and drywalled our garage. Let me assure you that my physical stamina is not what it used to be. I am also somewhat chagrined to admit that she seemed to hold up better than me. It was tough work. What I did not realize is that when I was watching my comedy shows the week before she obviously took note of what I was watching. When I would lag, run out of breath, not sure I could carry on, she would pipe up with, “let’s get r done”. It worked. We got it done. Will pay for that for some time to come. Actually, I notice her hurting just a bit too.
Humour is a real stress reliever. There is a reason that the Readers Digest has a regular feature called “Humour, the best medicine”. The Readers Digest would not lie, would they? Truth be known, and you can google this if you like, laughing releases certain hormones in the brain. In fact it benefits us in building up our immune system, decrease pain to mention just a few. It also helps in decreasing and coping with stress. Let me leave you with a quote from Helpguide. “Laughter is a powerful antidote to stress, pain, and conflict. Nothing works faster or more dependably to bring your mind and body back into balance than a good laugh. Humor lightens your burdens, inspires hopes, connects you to others, and keeps you grounded, focused, and alert.” That pretty much says it all. Now find something to make you laugh. Make it a good one.
Getting back to the title. Over the last week I have taped, oops, excuse me, recorded some comedy shows. Larry the Cable Guy is one of the comedians. Of course he is all about “Git R Done”. I enjoy his sense of humour. Throw in a little Jeff Foxworthy and you have a real show. The other two guys are not quite so funny so I can’t even remember their names. Don’t need too.
Do you know that kids will laugh up to 400 times a day? That is awesome. As adults that very often becomes a dismal 12 times a day. No wonder we have mental health issues. We need to laugh more. We had our grandson at our house this weekend. What a change of pace that is. Not only that. He laughs. He laughs at a lot. Made me envious. I got a real kick out of making him laugh. And when he laughed? Guess what? I had to laugh. Over the most mindless things I was splitting a gut. Wish I could do that more often.
My wife and I did a home renovation project last week. We insulated and drywalled our garage. Let me assure you that my physical stamina is not what it used to be. I am also somewhat chagrined to admit that she seemed to hold up better than me. It was tough work. What I did not realize is that when I was watching my comedy shows the week before she obviously took note of what I was watching. When I would lag, run out of breath, not sure I could carry on, she would pipe up with, “let’s get r done”. It worked. We got it done. Will pay for that for some time to come. Actually, I notice her hurting just a bit too.
Humour is a real stress reliever. There is a reason that the Readers Digest has a regular feature called “Humour, the best medicine”. The Readers Digest would not lie, would they? Truth be known, and you can google this if you like, laughing releases certain hormones in the brain. In fact it benefits us in building up our immune system, decrease pain to mention just a few. It also helps in decreasing and coping with stress. Let me leave you with a quote from Helpguide. “Laughter is a powerful antidote to stress, pain, and conflict. Nothing works faster or more dependably to bring your mind and body back into balance than a good laugh. Humor lightens your burdens, inspires hopes, connects you to others, and keeps you grounded, focused, and alert.” That pretty much says it all. Now find something to make you laugh. Make it a good one.
Wednesday, September 18, 2013
Out of the Closet
Okay. Here goes. Hang on to your hats. I am about to make an admission. This comes during an afternoon of trying REALLY hard to throw a birthday party for my dear wife. Not a big event. There will be approximately eight of us. Wow. What a lot of work. Just deciding on what kind of pizza I wanted was tough. Who knew? You now have three choices. Simple question. What is normal. I suppose I don’t do this enough.
Back to my admission. Midafternoon. I am weary. This birthday party thing is hard. One of the kids suggested an ice cream cake from DQ. Hey. I like that idea. Went to pick it up after I had ordered three pizzas with a normal, make that regular crust. Now the pressure is on. I will buy the cake, pick up the pizza, buy some beer or wine, and make it home before the cake melts. Tough job. But someone has to do it. Made it. Now to sit and wait. Probably did not order the right kind of pizza. I don’t care. I am hungry.
As I sit and wait I do the usual. Grab my laptop, check headlines. See if someone tried to contact me with skype, and then may play some solitaire. Solitaire is an interesting game. Totally mindless. Helps pass the time. Here is a warning. If you need to pass time by playing solitaire you need therapy. I know. I do.
I check the Winnipeg Sun. The usual gobbledegook about the Bombers. Isn’t that a gong show. Some other stories that involve either sex or violence. Big cocaine bust in Head. . . . Will you look at this. OMG. (sorry, this may become ugly) There is a report on a wrestler who has admitted to being gay. Can you imagine? Gay. God forbid.
Are you serious? In 2013 there are news headlines about someone being gay? Why? It makes no difference to me what side of the fence you may be on. It matters not to me what you may believe. I just cannot quite grasp the fact that being gay is noteworthy. I wish I had the space to tell you a story or two. I probably do. After all there is no limit to my space. Rather I will tell you someday when you may meet me. My stories make for good conversation pieces. (my wife may not agree)
Okay. Here is an admission. I am coming out of the closet. I am not gay. I am waiting? Did that make the headlines? No? What a relief. Not sure I want anybody to know.
It would seem to me that in this world of violence, homelessness, riots, war, child poverty, and many other deplorable and horrible crimes against humanity we would not become consumed by someone’s sexual preference. I find that incredibly sad.
Someone, who may or may not want to be acknowledged, sent me some information the other day. Him being a wise, biblical scholar type, must surely be telling the truth. He informed me that being gay and smoking pot is quite biblical. Apparently it says in Leviticus, a book in the Old Testament, that when a man lays with another man he should be stoned. That is what I am going with. I may be in the market. For pot, that is. Make it a good one.
Back to my admission. Midafternoon. I am weary. This birthday party thing is hard. One of the kids suggested an ice cream cake from DQ. Hey. I like that idea. Went to pick it up after I had ordered three pizzas with a normal, make that regular crust. Now the pressure is on. I will buy the cake, pick up the pizza, buy some beer or wine, and make it home before the cake melts. Tough job. But someone has to do it. Made it. Now to sit and wait. Probably did not order the right kind of pizza. I don’t care. I am hungry.
As I sit and wait I do the usual. Grab my laptop, check headlines. See if someone tried to contact me with skype, and then may play some solitaire. Solitaire is an interesting game. Totally mindless. Helps pass the time. Here is a warning. If you need to pass time by playing solitaire you need therapy. I know. I do.
I check the Winnipeg Sun. The usual gobbledegook about the Bombers. Isn’t that a gong show. Some other stories that involve either sex or violence. Big cocaine bust in Head. . . . Will you look at this. OMG. (sorry, this may become ugly) There is a report on a wrestler who has admitted to being gay. Can you imagine? Gay. God forbid.
Are you serious? In 2013 there are news headlines about someone being gay? Why? It makes no difference to me what side of the fence you may be on. It matters not to me what you may believe. I just cannot quite grasp the fact that being gay is noteworthy. I wish I had the space to tell you a story or two. I probably do. After all there is no limit to my space. Rather I will tell you someday when you may meet me. My stories make for good conversation pieces. (my wife may not agree)
Okay. Here is an admission. I am coming out of the closet. I am not gay. I am waiting? Did that make the headlines? No? What a relief. Not sure I want anybody to know.
It would seem to me that in this world of violence, homelessness, riots, war, child poverty, and many other deplorable and horrible crimes against humanity we would not become consumed by someone’s sexual preference. I find that incredibly sad.
Someone, who may or may not want to be acknowledged, sent me some information the other day. Him being a wise, biblical scholar type, must surely be telling the truth. He informed me that being gay and smoking pot is quite biblical. Apparently it says in Leviticus, a book in the Old Testament, that when a man lays with another man he should be stoned. That is what I am going with. I may be in the market. For pot, that is. Make it a good one.
Sunday, September 15, 2013
Watermelons
Many years ago, almost too many to remember, I delivered a watermelon to a certain house near Morris, Manitoba. Not sure where I got the idea from but did it nonetheless. You see, I had a very important question to ask the people in that house. A question that took weeks to compose, to rehearse, and to make sure I had right. Funny how when I got to the door I completely forgot my lines. It was nerve racking. You see, I was paying a visit to my girlfriend’s parents. I wanted their blessing in asking her the big question. Not sure what role the watermelon played in all of this.
Whatever the case I started a tradition. My wife has three sisters who got married after us. Each one of their husbands brought a melon when they arrived to ask the question. Really that was not quite fair. You see, when they showed up on the yard bearing a watermelon, the secret was out. The parents knew what was about to happen. Took a lot of the tension out of the air. There was a certain amount of time for preparation. Not so for me. I walked up to the door with a watermelon. They must have thought I lost my mind. To this day my father-in-law has flashbacks when he sees watermelons. Not sure the therapy worked. Perhaps it has something to do with who I actually turned out to be.
Seems that my kids were quite familiar with the story. We have only one daughter but suffice it to say her boyfriend has been told time and time again that should he want to marry my daughter there would need to be a watermelon involved.
He called me two weeks ago. The two of them had gone to the east coast to visit his family. He caught me during a break in my meeting. He asked the question. I said I didn’t have time to talk plus I didn’t see a watermelon anywhere. Hung up on him. Guess what. Last night he went shopping. Not just a watermelon. He brought me a watermelon, a cantaloupe and a muskmelon. So it is official. They are getting married. Oh, and just so you know, I did call him back later that day I hung up on him.
Last night I asked my daughter-in-law why she had never given me a watermelon. Her answer was that she had not asked for our blessing to marry our son. Got me thinking. Perhaps that needs to change. I mean with the whole idea of feminism and equality. I suggested it wasn`t too late. She could still do it. I won`t hold my breath.
This getting old has some interesting moments. Moments that provide memories for a life time. Two years ago I got a daughter-in-law, almost one year ago I got a grandson and now I am getting a son-in-law. I feel truly blessed when I look at our kids and see how they have developed and continue to develop. To see how our family is being added to. Sometimes when I feel a dark cloud hovering over me I need to remind myself of the positives in my life. And I can truly say that my family provides that positive energy. Watermelons or not. Make it a good one.
Whatever the case I started a tradition. My wife has three sisters who got married after us. Each one of their husbands brought a melon when they arrived to ask the question. Really that was not quite fair. You see, when they showed up on the yard bearing a watermelon, the secret was out. The parents knew what was about to happen. Took a lot of the tension out of the air. There was a certain amount of time for preparation. Not so for me. I walked up to the door with a watermelon. They must have thought I lost my mind. To this day my father-in-law has flashbacks when he sees watermelons. Not sure the therapy worked. Perhaps it has something to do with who I actually turned out to be.
Seems that my kids were quite familiar with the story. We have only one daughter but suffice it to say her boyfriend has been told time and time again that should he want to marry my daughter there would need to be a watermelon involved.
He called me two weeks ago. The two of them had gone to the east coast to visit his family. He caught me during a break in my meeting. He asked the question. I said I didn’t have time to talk plus I didn’t see a watermelon anywhere. Hung up on him. Guess what. Last night he went shopping. Not just a watermelon. He brought me a watermelon, a cantaloupe and a muskmelon. So it is official. They are getting married. Oh, and just so you know, I did call him back later that day I hung up on him.
Last night I asked my daughter-in-law why she had never given me a watermelon. Her answer was that she had not asked for our blessing to marry our son. Got me thinking. Perhaps that needs to change. I mean with the whole idea of feminism and equality. I suggested it wasn`t too late. She could still do it. I won`t hold my breath.
This getting old has some interesting moments. Moments that provide memories for a life time. Two years ago I got a daughter-in-law, almost one year ago I got a grandson and now I am getting a son-in-law. I feel truly blessed when I look at our kids and see how they have developed and continue to develop. To see how our family is being added to. Sometimes when I feel a dark cloud hovering over me I need to remind myself of the positives in my life. And I can truly say that my family provides that positive energy. Watermelons or not. Make it a good one.
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