Let’s Talk, Again

1 in 5 Canadians will experience a form of mental illness in their lives. This from Bell’s, Let’s Talk website. Apparently 500,000 Canadians a day miss work because of mental health issues. A scary thought, to say the least. The commercials put on by Bell this year paint a vivid picture. They hit home for me. Got me thinking.

I looked back and realized I wrote on the same topic a year ago. It seems to be an annual event. That in itself is a sad commentary. This should not be a once a year conversation. This should be an ongoing discussion. Mental illness is real. As stated above it is a serious problem for many. Awareness is key.

Recently I dealt with a situation that involved a person with significant mental health issues. As in most of the mediation files I work with the party on the “other” side was puzzled. How is this different from the other files we deal with? Why should we treat it differently?

Just prior to that question being asked they had explained how this person was not responding. They were not answering the phone. Mail was not picked up. Calls not returned. In my mind I just thought, “I rest my case”. It was because the person was not functioning. The stress in that person’s life had pushed her beyond the ability to cope. There was only darkness. There was no future.

It is not easy to make sense of this stuff. Not something we are used to. We need to recognize what is happening. When stress hangs around for a long period of time we begin to lose focus. We lose our ability to cope. We begin to look for change. In many cases, in sheer desperation, we look for help from above. We simply have given up on anything that makes sense. Anything that might have helped in the past. We cry for help.

Therein lies a problem. Often times we look in the wrong place. Mental health issues are not readily talked about. We feel embarrassed. Ashamed. Our self-esteem is shaken. We must recognize that we are experiencing a health issue. At one point, in talking to a client, I became frustrated. When I suggested that he needed to see a doctor, he had just described his symptoms, he wondered if seeking the help of a spiritual care giver would work. I asked him whether he would seek the help of that spiritual care giver if he broke his leg. Please don’t take that comment the wrong way. The point is that we need to recognize mental health issues for what they are. “Health” issues.

I have been reading a book that tells stories about people who have had various struggles in life. The story I read last night deals with a fellow who suffered significant abuse as a child. Although there are many details in the story, details that leaves the reader shaken, the point is made that his recovery could only begin when he began to talk about his issues. Issues that had ruined two marriages. Issues that left him feeling lost. Eventually he did begin to talk. And as he talked others talked as well. And the healing began.

There are two points here. First of all, if you suffer from any type of over whelming stress, anxiety, or depression, find someone to talk to. A family member, a neighbor, a professional. Anyone that will take the time to listen. Secondly, as part of a community, it is incumbent that we are more aware of people that are hurting. More aware of issues that are debilitating and life defining those close to us. We must all learn to talk more about mental health issues. Make it a good one.