A Honey Do List

Just in case you care, I have now made the bed for five weeks straight. Okay, just to be clear, I don’t always get to it first on the weekends. But during the week I haven’t missed a day. It is kind of interesting how this has turned out. I have found out it only takes a minute. It really does make me feel better. And not only that, I now find it rather disturbing to see an unmade bed. Who would have thought that at my age that could happen? Perhaps there can be more changes.

I now think my wife, who cannot be named, feels that perhaps other changes can happen as well. For years now I have been quite adamant that should I ever see a “honey do” list there would be some significant ramifications. I mean seriously. I have threatened to leave the marriage should that happen. I maintain, and all wives should take note, that if a man says he will do something he will. He does not need to be reminded every six months.

I really thought my wife, who cannot be named, understood this. Unfortunately today I have found out different. Perhaps I never should have started making the bed. I really think that is to blame for the dilemma I face this morning. As much as it made me feel better it has now apparently opened the door for more. Really? Is one significant change not enough for a while? I thought we had a system that protected me from the dreaded “honey do” list.

My wife, who cannot be named, is organized, to say the least. She makes lists for herself. I would not be at all surprised if in her binder, yes, she has a binder, there would already be a list for some gathering that may or may not happen at Christmas, 2018. Seriously, she is quite anal about that. I have noticed lately that her binder is open to her most recent to do page and placed in a prevalent place on our kitchen counter. And, on occasion, I will glance at it, making sure she doesn’t see that, and actually do some of the tasks she has listed. Perhaps that is what has led to my fall from grace. Honestly, I was just trying to be helpful.

I noticed last night that there was some sarcasm involved when she asked what my schedule was like for this week. You see, being self-employed with my type of work can bring about periods of little work. She hints at the fact that I seem to be semi-retired. I insist I have a flexible schedule. I told her I had a conference call slated for this morning. In a less than a loving voice she commented on how busy my life was. Having said that she had just come off a twelve hour workday. Perhaps I should be more understanding.

But this morning I received an email that may well change my life forever. Not only that, it came just as I was teeing off on the 14th hole. Really. Don’t you think that is rather inconsiderate? That is a rhetorical question. No answer required. Normally an email from her that early is a cheerful “good morning” or a quiet “you up yet”. But not today.

She, who cannot be named, sent me a list of things that need to get done around here. A “honey do” list. Quite literally it is paralyzing. Now I can’t get anything done. How can I carry on? Perhaps I should pack my suitcase and get out while the getting out is good. However, there is a beacon of hope here. The last item on her list was to have a nap. That might just get me to stick around a little longer. And to think, all because I started making the bed. Make it a good one.

“If you can’t change the circumstances, change your perspective.”